One of the first few posts in this blog, after terminating my old blog The Save Points and starting JOBOCAN Game Reviews, was a reaction to the February Direct last year… So I figure… why not do it again? I’ve actually reacted to most “main” Nintendo Directs even though I wasn’t planning to, so I might as well keep it going. I haven’t been doing this for much else outside of E3 since the competition isn’t announcing or releasing anything, or doing fun events like this (and, when they do, they’re awful… Hi Playstation), but hey, at least Nintendo tries to be somewhat interesting.

I am writing this intro the day before the Direct, as I always do. I have no real predictions here. There are some weird rumors like a 1-2 Switch sequel, and TWO different Metroid Prime rumors that have been going on for years without anything happening (Prime Trilogy rumors being around since 2017, and those have transitioned into Prime 1 Remaster rumors more recently… pick a side, shitty fake leakers), but I’d say there’s nothing really good to latch on to that’s even slightly believable except the Batman one… which is extremely minor so who cares.

I don’t know what to expect beyond probably a bit of Splatoon 3 stuff since that’s probably coming out around E3 season, but otherwise, it could be anything. I am 99% sure Metroid Prime 4 won’t be there because it’s only been 3 years since it started development, so it’s not like it’s in hell status or anything, and I don’t think the BotW sequel will be there either as that will likely get a big E3-season blowout. So… Yeah, could be fun, might not be, I have no idea. There’s plenty it could be, but Nintendo is largely unpredictable. Like, last February’s Direct had 4-6 new first-party game announcements depending on how you count that. So there’s reason to believe they might do that again… but it’s Nintendo, they don’t do patterns, so they might not.

No idea if I’m actually gonna post this, we’ll see if I click the publish button after writing it. If I do post it… let’s go and watch this Direct!

So I’m gonna be doing the usual, a live reaction that I’ll write as I’m watching the Direct, with just a bit to say about each announcement, followed by a slightly more thought-out “Overall Thoughts” portion. As I’m writing this the Direct is a minute away from starting… so time to watch and write!

“Live” Reactions

Knights, pegasuses, seems like Fire Emblem. It is… Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes. It’s a sequel to Fire Emblem Three Houses maybe? Seems like an alternate timeline thing (kinda like how Age of Calamity did). But of course, it’s a Warriors game so it plays like a Warriors game. The first FEW was my favorite Musou, so I’m fine with more. June 24, 2022.

Advance Wars 1+2. Doesn’t look particularly different from the last time we saw it. Still a cool release. There’s some nice wasted budget with voice acting here. There’s online multiplayer. And it’s out April 8, which we knew because the eshop already said that but this is actual confirmation.

No Man’s Sky. It’s just No Man’s Sky. It looked pretty awful, though I see a lot of people saying it got good in later updates after the disastrous release… I don’t like that mentality, a game should be good at launch, and deserves nothing if it’s not, even if they “fix” it. Summer release.

Mario Strikers? Yup. Can’t say I was expecting that. Mario Strikers: Battle League. Looks like it should be pretty good, especially for local play with 8 players on the same Switch. Also seems to have good online ideas (though that requires NSO so.. whatever). Coming June 10. Nice. Not sure I’ll get it, but it looks good.

Helicopters… That looks like Splatoon writing on those banners… Yeah, Splatoon 3 time. It’s that Salmon Run mode which was pretty fun in 2. Showing some new bosses and new features like throwing eggs. Summer 2022 release for the game, makes sense.

Wanzers at the ready… Wanzers? Front Mission? Well holy shit, Front Mission 1st remake. Cool shit. Looks like a decent candidate for a remake at least since it’s a bit of a lesser-known series, and a great game. I’m okay with this. This looks like a pretty good remake too. Out this summer. And they’re remaking 2 as well, coming later.

Disney Pixar kart racer game. Looks like a pretty average Mario Kart ripoff. Disney Speedstorm. Free-to-play. This summer. Meh.

“Classic Franchises”… Star Wars Force Unleashed. Is that a “classic” already? It was okay, but “classic”? Eh. April 20. Assassin’s Creed Ezio Collection (definitely not a classic). Shitty shit coming to Switch, yay. We knew that already, it’s out this month. SD Gundam Battle Alliance. Looks kinda fun. Out sometime this year.

Two Worlds Cross… Chrono Cross: Radical Dreamers Edition. Huh. There were rumors for this that I kinda forgot about, actually. You know, I missed this game the first time around in the PS1 days, I played it a couple of times but never got all that far into it. And it includes Radical Dreamers, which is really cool. Not my kind of game as it’s a text-based adventure, but very nice to finally see an English release. April 7.

On to Kirby. I’m mostly ignoring this trailer because I’ve seen more than enough about it. I don’t think Nintendo needs to show any more of this game. We want it already, right? I’m only listening to the audio, sounds like it has some cool ideas. I’m not watching though. Can’t wait to play this next month.

MLB The Show, don’t care.

Collections! KH cloud crap version. No one wants this. Klonoa? Klonoa Fantasy Reverie Series, it includes 2 of the games. Very nice, I might actually get that. Portal 1 and 2 collection. Okay sure.

Another classic… Live A Live? Wait, whoa. This never came out here, and it’s using the HD-2D graphics… well fuck that’s cool. July 22, awesome. I hope it’s good, I’ve never played this.

Nintendo Switch Sports… It’s Wii Sports, but on Switch. I have no idea why this is a thing, maybe just hoping lightning strikes twice… I dunno, it ain’t the Wii days. I mean, it looks fine, but I’m not convinced this is something I’d want to grab for anything over 5$… They sure are spending a long time on this game… Koizumi and Takahashi are playing a volleyball match for some reason… Just end this, please. Okay, April 29, 2022… Next game, please. Okay, doing free updates with more games and beta tests… Whatever man. Stahp.

New Taiko no Tatsujin game. Sure looks like Taiko no Tatsujin. Still waiting for a drum accessory to play this that is both not overpriced AND decent quality. Anyways, it’s coming this year, it’s called Taiko no Tatsujin Rhythm Festival. Paid subscription service? Wat?

What’s new with these games? We’ll see. Triangle Strategy! Still looks solid, that’s out soon. So they’re releasing a demo, that has the game go up to chapter 3, and save data can be transferred to the final game. Cuphead DLC… They’re just showing a trailer we’ve seen before. Free update for Metroid Dread. One-hit-death mode, nice. Baby mode, lame shitty shit. Later today. And boss rush mode in April.

Something’s Bound for Nintendo Switch. Is it EARTH Bound? Yeah. Just Earthbound and Mother coming to the shitty online service. Yo ho yo ho. Seriously just release Mother 3. I’ve actually NOT played the fan translation for Mother 3 because I figured Nintendo would eventually release it… You know, like normal companies would do for something fans want so much. Guess not. I’ve been waiting a LONG ASS TIME for Mother 3, guess I’ll keep waiting.

Seems we’re getting into a montage, pausing to get the titles and stuff. Zombie Army 4, whatever… GetsuFumaDen: Undying Moon, that looks pretty hype… Wait AVAILABLE TODAY WHAT… That shitty Demon Slayer arena fighter, June 10, whatever. LEGO Brawls? Okay… Whatever looks lame. Two Point Campus, sure. And that’s it for the montage.

Mario Kart? HMMM. Wait, remastering courses? So not a new game? Paid DLC. What? Okay, this is REALLY weird. Mario Kart 8 is an 8 year old game, releasing DLC for that is kinda fucking wild. These sure look like a bunch of courses. 8 courses per wave… 6 fucking waves? That’s 48 courses, over the next 2 years. That’s basically a whole new Mario Kart game. For 24.99? That’s kind of a banger, ngl… Even though it’s a really fucking weird release.

Alright, new game. The character gives me some Fire Emblem vibes, he’s fluting it up. Wait, voice acting, it’s British, this is Xenoblade. Lots of cutscene stuff I don’t care about yet. The gameplay segments look awesome though. And yeah, this is Xenoblade Chronicles 3. Coming September 2022, nice, that’s very close.

Overall

This was a pretty fucking great Direct. With only a few bits of downtime and a few “wtf” or just kinda boring segments (Taiko, Disney Kart, some of the montage parts, Sony Baseball), but this had a lot of great stuff overall.

Several big first-party announcements (some I don’t care about, some I do). 4 completely new games and several release dates/seasons for some we already knew about… and 48 new fucking tracks for Mario Kart 8 DX because lol I guess. That weirded me out, but hey, it’s not a bad deal. Xenoblade 3, Fire Emblem Warriors, and Mario Strikers are all pretty hype. I dunno about Nintendo Switch Sports but hey, it might sell… not to me, but it might sell. This was a lot of cool stuff from Nintendo themselves.

And the third-party side also had lots of great stuff too. Chrono Cross remaster with Radical Dreamers, Live A Live remake in HD-2D graphics, GetsuFumaDen being out right now, Klonoa collection, Front Mission remake, all pretty cool. Actually kinda weird that all the cool third-party stuff is very retro-oriented, I’m very okay with that.

I’d say this is a solid A from Nintendo, very good Direct. Anyone who is mad… is not thinking.

Also, I checked the Japanese direct as I was editing this, nothing different other than an FMV adventure game called “The Centennial Case: A Shijima Story” which is definitely not coming out here, some Sengoku-era grand strategy game that has a kinda retro look to it (didn’t quite catch the name), and a kinda cool-looking anime-style RPG with lots of visual novel elements called LOOP8 which hopefully will come out here one day. There were a couple more minor games in montages that were different but nothing important (stuff we know about already mostly).

Seriously who announces DLC for a game that came out 8 years ago? Nintendo are fucking mad lads.